I AM on the River of Life (Wisdom Part 2 of 3)

 

BOOK #2

PART I:  I AM ON THE RIVER OF LIFE (A MODERN-DAY ODYSSEY THROUGH THE KINGDOM OF GOD)

I was inside a forest on one side of this bridge that stretched over a small chasm, and on the other side, I saw Myself.  As I stepped on the bridge to walk to the other side, both the bridge and I on the other side disappeared.  Soon I realized that the only way to get to the other side was to take the long way around by the path that began behind me.  And so I turned around and took it. With miles of walk, like an open stream, and people living in the buildings along, this path I’m on, together in simple song.  The place where I was going I pictured there was white, where I could live secure in purity and light.  So from there my journey had started, waiving to my past as I parted. And when I approached the end of the path, I was happy.  And I looked over the chasm to me in the beginning, and I was staring back at me, and I then felt a great sorrow for those who hadn’t yet turned around.

 

INTRODUCTION

When I was a child and I was afraid, the only way I could get to sleep was to imagine myself lying in a safe space or like a small room with my love standing on the outside of it telling all those bad things trying to get in to “Go away! My Child is sleeping.” And I not only slept, but I rested.

My parents divorced when I was seven.  Afterwards, I had no father, only a man who would come around maybe once every few years.

Much later in life, believing in an unconditionally loving God (I AM), I felt compelled (called) to face my greatest fears of abandonment and loneliness.  My journey on the river had begun.  I heard I AM telling me to move out on my own.  And so I did with the full intention of leaving everybody behind. I was scared to death. It was my time in the Valley of Fear deep inside the World of Pride.  You’ll sometimes hear me call it a desert or woods from where I make it back to the river as described in my book “I AM on the River of Life”. But after, I heard I AM say to me that He was proud of me and that I was always such a sweet little boy in His eyes. 

My biggest problem was that I did not love myself because I didn’t understand the meaning of unconditional love. I did not know what real love meant and how real love was to be shown and received. But it was during this time, in what I call my desert, that I found what unconditional love meant. I found that unconditional love meant God. I could say that God’s spirit just filled me. I felt strong and alive, and I felt like I had crossed a bridge into a new world of my own where I was growing up.

So I went back home.  And soon after, I heard this voice again telling me to write down what I should have been taught when I was a child.  I was to become an adult.  My own I Am was going to raise me as my father. So I Am shared Himself with me for years after, and I wrote down everything He told me. And after each thing He said to me, I practiced it in the real world. I then went to the Bible and found a loving affirmation on what I had done. It didn’t take very long to discover that this was the real me, human and all.

See, in my life, I had searched for answers everywhere I could.  I traveled over land and swam in oceans.  I searched the outermost reaches of my mind. I studied and pondered over my logic and my emotions.  I tried to figure out “why” when it came to suffering. I even looked up at the stars wondering.  And I never found an answer.

And then I sought God and found the answer I was looking for that opened up the door.  And then I realized that all along, through it all, I was and still am just my Father’s child, heeding my Father’s call from my Father’s home, and never had I been alone.  Living a happy and peaceful life is the realization of this.  So now instead of my love saying, “Go away! My Child is sleeping,” I’m living instead in that space that I call Life and in Love. I’ve expanded my room so greatly that I am no longer afraid and lonely because I have people and things I love filling it and who love me.

I don’t give it much thought anymore because I know my love is always there to protect me no matter what.  And I Am happy and In Love to this day.  And it has dawned on me this day that what I was laying within was My Soul — that I did not realize that God had given me.  I just didn’t know what to call it.

I Am on the River of Life is a children’s epic journey and modern odyssey guided by I Am who takes children through the Three Heavens in the Kingdom of God by way of a river with 12 harbors along the way.  I Am provides general knowledge of each of the harbors as they go by.  The journey on the river is illustrated here

Enjoy the journey!  I give you a prayer to start you on your Way.

 

Love and Peace,

Tim

 

‘Tis thee o’ my Father,

Confused in what is real.

Lost to my wits and seeking out others,

For my soul to heal.

Following this and following that,

Searching everywhere.

And yet to no avail,

For here I reappear.

Of this place I know no mercy,

Of this place I know Nowhere.

No one knows the shame,

And the pain that I have hidden.

A shame that I obtained,

That I beg to be forgiven.

Comfort me my Father,

For I know not where to go.

Deliver to me your Truth,

So I will not feel alone.

Show to me your hands,

So that I may come nestle in your arms.

And make for me a bed,

As a newborn safe and warm.

 

I AM ON THE RIVER OF LIFE

The First Heaven

There is a river,

And the river flows through the great lands of life.

It flows from the first great harbor of sight.

There is a Spirit of the river whose name is I AM,

Who guides boys and girls,

Through all the lands.

When it’s time to part,

I AM calls, “Get ready to start.”

This makes the boys and girls ponder.

I AM? they wonder.

I AM who?

And so their journey begins,

Without further ado.

And once they hear,

That familiar voice,

They drop their gear,

And then through choice,

For the river they leave,

To the river’s first harbor,

Between them and the water,

Called Believe.

And into I AM’s boat they go,

To find out what,

 I AM knows.

I’m scared to leave, says one boy.

Of what I can see, it looks pretty dark out there,

To me.

And I AM says,

There’s plenty of light on the river to see.

Do not worry,

You’ll be with Me.

Of course you’re scared.

It’s not at all rare.

This River goes through,

A valley called Fear.
But first is our task, To find the next harbor.
Its name is Ask.

Just a little farther.

And a girl said,

When we get there,

Will you go down the river with us,

 Through the Valley of Fear?

Wow! Ask came quick,

said another girl.

Yes, Ask can come quick, I AM said.

Whenever you fear,

What’s up ahead.

Or whenever you’re lost or unsure,

Ask is there,

 For help to appear,

And make you secure.

And yes,

 I AM will go with you,

Through the rest.

I AM won’t leave.

Well, look at that!

We’re now at the next harbor,

Of Receive.

See,

When you believe,

I AM you can ask,

To receive.

This is why the harbors of Ask and Receive,

Are so huddled together,

Because when in you,

Someone believes,

They are willing to help you,

Get what you need.

But if I AM does stay,

You’ll have to obey,

 Because the Valley of Fear,

 When it draws near,

  One of you may,

 Just run away.

Okay, the boys and girls say.

So up ahead,

Is Commit.

When we reach that harbor,

I AM needs all of you to turn towards Me,

And sit,

To let,

 I AM know you’re serious about your task,

When you asked for I AM’s help,

 In Ask.

For you were right,

To ask for I AM’s help on who,

Because only I AM can help you,

 Know you.

And right when they approached the harbor of Commit,

All the boys and girls turned to I AM,

And chose to sit.

Excellent, says I AM.

Now soon we will near,

The Valley of Fear.

But before that,

 I AM,

You need to understand.

So anchored the boat did I AM,

At the next harbor called Understand.

It was here in Understand,

 That the boys and girls listened and learned,

 About I AM.

And just then,

A dove from the land,

Flew in the hand,

Of I AM.

Do you see this dove, asks I AM?

  I AM gave it Unconditional Love.

  It is the same kind of love that I AM,

Feeds you,

 In Understand.

So I AM asks all of you,

 What do you think and how do you feel,

 While you’re listening to I AM?

As you look into I AM’s eyes,

 Does it feel,

 Real?

And so each of the children,

Said what they think and how they feel,

 When he and she is around I AM.

 And every one of them said,

What they think and how they feel,

About I AM,

 Is real.

Yes, said I AM.

The harbor of Understand,

Makes all the difference.

So many rush through this harbor,

Leaving themselves,

Ignorant.

And then they wonder why,

They wind up in Pride.

If only they knew how to communicate.

It’s never too late.

Whenever you come to Understand,

You should take your time with I AM.

You’re learning the basics with I AM now,

But there is so much more for you to learn,

Than our time will allow.

You and your I Am will learn much more alone,

After I AM leaves,

And goes on home.

We don’t understand, I AM.  Says the boys and girls.

I AM knows.

You will though.

Just remember, always make time in Understand,

And your judgment will then be sound, and,

The truth will be found,

In your foundation,

From here on out,

 In every nation.

And I AM then lifted the anchor and rode the tide,

 To the next harbor called Decide.

Okay, we’re here at Decide, says I AM.

It’s high time and high tide.

This last harbor is here,

Before the Valley of Fear.

Oh my, say the boys and girls.

We’re so scared.

 We’re terrified,

 In the harbor of Decide.

Why is that?, asks I AM.

Is it because it’s where it’s at?

We don’t know how to act,

Or if we can make it through the Valley of Fear,

From here to there, says a boy.

Funny you say that, says I AM,

Because the harbor of Act,

 Is where the Valley of Fear is actually at.

It takes much courage to go through Act,

Because Act is how you practice your Fact.

What’s your Fact? asks the girls and boys.

I AM is Fact,

Known also as Truth.

This is why I AM said,

Sound judgment will help you,

Make it through,

From the harbor of Decide,

And up ahead through Act,

In the World of Pride.

All will enter to be aware,

But it will only be those who dared,

To take their time in Understand,

That will one day,

 Turn away,

From those lands,

When they’ve seen enough,

And come back to the river,

From acting tough.

Act is where you find, well, you,

As I AM and you,

Make it through.

And who are we? asks a girl.

You are human as you can see.

But it is only by going through,

This valley,

 Will you come to have,

Empathy and compassion,

For humanity.

To trust in I AM,

When you experience those who live,

In those lands.

Those who are stuck,

Not understanding enough,

Believing no way out,

Or struggling,

To get out.

To experience their pain,

But only for a time,

Because remember again,

You’ll have I Am inside.

Always remember that,

I Am’s there to set you free.

When you start to believe,

You can’t leave,

Come back to the river,

And sail your boat,

On through Accept,

And into Devote.

Then no longer in Pride,

You’ll find inside,

Humbled and thankful to be,

Where you are,

From I Am’s generosity.

For I Am knows it all,

Trust I Am so you won’t fall.

Of those in Pride who refuse to leave,

Leave them be.

But for those who see,

Finding it hard,

For them to leave,

These are the ones,

I Am sets free,

From their involuntary,

Captivity.

Whether in heaven or on earth,

They will see free,

By their rebirth.

  

You can refrain,

And delay the pain.

But know that if you stay away,

Then a thief in the night,

Fear’s gravity,

Will pull you,

 Into its light.

Then when in sight,

You will fall victim,

To Fear’s plight,

Choosing this side or that,

And forgetting I AM,

As Fact.

And so I AM is here,

To help you with Fear.

But before you are sent,

I AM will give you a hint,

 Of what you will face,

 If you turn away,

And decide to stay here,

In this place.

Listen to what happened to a child,

 As he continued to remain,

Here all the while.

There was a child whose father came,

To ask him a question all the same.

Son, he said,

I’m going to give you three ways to choose.

Choose well on what to do.

You can avoid life and live on a cloud.

You can judge life and be very proud.

Or you can enter life and walk with the crowd.

First of all, which is better? the father asked.

I’m not sure, the son gasped.

Then go,

Try them all and let me know.

So, the son went away,

And then one day,

He came to his father,

With something to say.

Father, I have experienced them one and all,

But neither is better than the other at all.

I have tried to escape, but it’s too late,

‘Cause I have grown.

I have tried to judge,

But I keep reaping what I have sown.

I tried to please and tried to conform,

 And tried to act all fuzzy and warm,

But then all I feel is so much alone.

Then the father asked,

Then what will you do?

What other choice is there for you?

Then the boy said,

Father, when you gave me the choices to decide,

Instead of speaking,

I chose to hide.

Since it was not a choice you gave,

And rather than misbehave,

I let myself down,

That day.

 See, I don’t want to avoid,

And I don’t want to condemn,

 And I don’t want to please and conform,

Again and again.

I feel so ashamed to tell you my wish.

But where are my footsteps in all this?

I don’t mean to gripe,

But when is it time,

For me to live life?

When is time,

For me to feel right?

And the father explained.

My son, many avoid and many complain,

Many conform and many condemn,

Over and over and over again.

But you,

You wish to be apart.

Now I know,

You’re ready to start.

Then I AM said to the girls and boys,

So, what do you say?

You have to decide.

You can’t always delay.

You have to get off that fence,

Of indecision one day.

You can start early or late.

When will you choose to act,

And try your hand with Fact?

You’ll be with us you say?

asks the boys and girls.

I AM will be with you all the way.

So they all huddled to make a decision.

And their choice to Act,

Was their admission.

Okay, let’s go.

We want to know.

 

The Second Heaven

And so off they went,

To the Valley of Fear,

Following the way of I AM,

As Act appeared.

The River is narrow here,

 In the Valley of Fear,

observes a girl.

Yes, there is much more land than River here,

 In the Valley of Fear.

On each side,

Are the lands of the World of Pride.

Some call them Ego.

But whatever they may call it,

It is not,

Where you want to go.

And yes, some call it Sin.

Seeing Inside Nobody;

No person within.

On the right live people,

Whose name is Aggressive.

Their actions excessive.

Throwers of sticks and of stones.

Taking care of only their own.

On the left live people whose name is Passive.

They see inside,

Nobody too.

They are indifferent,

 About I AM and you.

So, they turn their backs.

That’s how they attack,

To those in need.

Without esteem.

They can’t stand each other,

But yet they build tunnels,

To link one another.

They are too children of humanity,

But have been pulled in,

By Fear’s gravity.

Look at all the little sailboats,

Anchored on each side, says a boy.

Yes, one boat for each child in Pride, says I AM.

Where are the tunnels?

The tunnels are under the river,

Where they believe,

I AM won’t see.

They refuse me.

Yet all of them believe,

 At least down deep,

 An inkling in Me.

But it’s those outside,

Before Believe.

With those,

You cannot be.

The evil in them are so great.

They love to orchestrate,

And manipulate,

Things like hate.

In fact, you are seen,

As nothing but bait.

In other words,

They love to see your despair,

By seeing how far you’ll go,

On a dare.

Then,

Laughing in the end,

When,

You’ve fallen for their whims.

No conscience at’ll.

Only the desire,

To have your soul.

That is the world of insanity,

Of those who actually,

Plan iniquity.

These are those behind the scene,

Instilling in children,

 Before Believe.

Yet still much iniquity,

Resides inside,

Those of Pride,

Warring between I AM’s majesty,

And iniquity’s gravity.

On one end,

 A temptation for depravity,

And on the other end,

A peaceful humanity.

But all iniquity,

Is trickery.

A way for those outside,

To keep you in Pride.

And as long as you deny,

I AM’s replies,

In Pride will you be,

For all eternity.

But the truth that those in Pride,

Do not realize,

And those outside,

Go to great lengths to disguise,

Is that once you pass Believe,

Those behind the scene,

No longer have the power,

To keep you in,

Iniquity.

That I AM’s power,

Towers,

Throughout all,

Infinity.

The depths of hurt,

In the past,

When experiencing them,

In Act,

Is different.

Before you felt helpless,

Like residing in a pit.

Your life feeling useless,

As everyone around,

Looks down,

And spits.

But once you Believe,

Your life now has purpose,

Lifting you out of the pit,

Knowing one day,

You will help free,

Those once like you,

From that calamity,

Of Iniquity.

And on that day,

You will say,

Suicide is useless,

And it’s going to be okay.

But Believe isn’t enough,

To get you to your goal.

Enough it is to save your soul.

But to get you to your goal,

You must sail the river,

With I AM as your guide,

And you at,

I AM’s side.

For I AM is the expert on Life,

And only I AM’s spirit in you,

Knows your purpose,

And the lands of the river,

On your left and your right.

The intricacies,

Only your sprit knows,

To help you sail,

Through the throws,

And acquire the right knowledge,

And accumulate the right wisdom,

To avail.

You’ll discover those who needed to accept,

Responsibility.

But Responsibility exists only,

Once you’ve passed Believe,

And asked to receive.

So now you see.

The cowards,

Who hiding behind the scene.

For once you reach,

The harbor of Confidence,

Then you have the power,

To highlight the true pestilent,

And step in and rescue,

The innocent.

For only the innocent,

Are impressionable enough,

To be deceived by the pestilent.

To actually think it they,

Who were the decay,

And so insolent.

But once you believe,

The truth is discovered,

After enough sailing on the river,

That their love was none other,

Than a ruse and abuse

From the soulless minds,

Of a wicked refuse.

Though the way it works,

Is that the river doesn’t widen,

That only some become enlightened.

Most remain closer to Believe,

And yes, some do make it to Free.

But before I AM came to you now,

Very few knew the way how,

The river travels and,

 The lands behave.

I AM is hoping,

That after today,

More people,

Will make their way,

From Pride,

Up through their embarrassment,

To which there is no shame,

And into acceptance,

Over the Bridge of Humane.

See, there is a thing,

Called Self-Esteem.

Self is you and Esteem is Me.

The further away you are from Me,

The greater the chance you will be,

In Act,

Behaving either,

Aggressively or Passively.

Tell us more, says the same boy.

Well, the Passives and Aggressives, they toy,

With one another.

You mean, like my father and mother?

Well, all I AM can say,

Is that sometimes,

Violence comes their way.

It sometimes gets sticky.

See, the Passives fall for the Aggressives,

 Most rather quickly.

With Aggressives, some Passives will stay,

And be abused by their way.

Others won’t play.

 So with these others,

The Aggressives take them through the tunnels,

 And throw them away.

Into Passive lands they go,

Stricken of their names,

Where they hide in small towns,

Called Pity and Shame.

But back through the tunnels to the Aggressive,

Some of them go.

Throwing their own sticks and stones.

Can they ever come back? asks a girl.

You mean on the River from Act?

Oh, yes.  To I AM, they can always come back.

Now, that is a fact.

I AM is with them and loves them,

Though they can,

 Not believe that of I AM.

See, both sides of Pride,

 Feel miserable inside.

That,

 They will always deny.

So when they see I AM sailing by,

The Passives turn their backs and hide.

And the Aggressives look to one another,

Then tell lies about I AM,

To each other.

Why do they tell lies to one another?

Can’t they see that they’re just hurting each other?

The Aggressives refuse to really understand,

Deeply I AM.

They’ve been telling the same stories for so very long,

They believe everyone but them,

 Is wrong.

Bad do they say.

You’re being bad today.

And if you don’t obey,

In Shame you go,

Right away!

But the truth is that as Passives,

They are the same.

They just hide what’s inside,

By not being tame.

They too are bent,

On being belligerent.

But what keeps them out of the River?

Neither trusts anyone; not even a sliver.

 They are scared,

To give anyone the benefit of the doubt.

That those who accept I AM,

Are calm, loving, and fair,

And understand their discomfort,

And why they are out.

But still they say,

“I AM, you don’t know what you’re talking about.

This is not how we were taught.

You are not the I AM,

You are a deceiving thought.”

If you children are as kind as I AM,

To those who seem tough,

Then perhaps one day they will trust enough,

To just,

Like you did at Believe,

Come to I AM and proceed.

And thus,

 They may remember the dreams they kept,

And follow I AM in their boat,

 To Accept.

Yes, they are very much afraid.

For they were abandoned, beaten, or told,

That I AM would scold,

If ever they leave Pride one day.

Some were shamefully torn,

From their parents telling them,

That they wish,

They’d never been born.

But don’t you worry.

They, I AM will not ignore,

For,

To I AM, children they are,

Up the river.

Just not very far.

And some are young and some are old.

Some are stubborn, some are bold.

But still, these children,

I AM will not ignore.

I AM always sails,

And calls from shore.

Some to shore will make their way,

But most still choose in Fear to stay.

Would you scold? asks a girl.

No, I AM knows those in Shame.

I AM knows their pain.

But I AM will not refrain,

From directing those who must be trained.

See instead,

I AM asserts their focus ahead.

No more Fear exists,

But only I AM’s love,

I AM insists.

In Accept, they will see.

And one day say,

Life is life and human are we.

But first,

 Out of Fear,

We must be.

For, shame is dead up ahead,

Only an illusion or deception bred,

From another person’s head.

Then relieved,

Of the misery,

 They will be,

When only they see,

 I AM’s love, compassion,

And generosity.

Then only love and devotion,

Will be known.

Can you imagine this on your own?

But alas, not yet are you ready,

For this to be shown.

So let us now,

Continue without them,

Alone.

But I still don’t understand, says a girl.

Why do they stay,

If they’re so miserable that way?

 They feed off one another in sin,

That’s what works for them.

They do it differently, you see,

But share the same philosophy.

  The Passives’ reward is the Aggressives’ attention.

And the Aggressives’ reward is the Passives’ submission.

And a boy says,

I’m glad you told us about Fear from the start.

Going through Fear,

Isn’t as scary,

As I first thought.

That’s right.

I AM brings to you,

Everything in-sight,

To first know and understand,

 So you won’t fall,

Into these lands.

See, each person perceives,

 The harbors like Believe,

 All a bit differently.

I AM understands this fact,

 And knows how people act.

But being different doesn’t mean,

You won’t stay in tact.

Yes, in fact,

Get ready.

There’s no such thing as sin,

Except only one,

You need to believe in.

The only sin you need to study,

 Is when you choose to,

Like I AM said,

 See Inside Nobody.

This is what the Aggressives and Passives,

Sometimes do.

The Passives put the Aggressives on a pedestal,

And the Aggressives put themselves there,

 To rule.

I AM still loves them and gives them laws,

Because they hear,

But won’t listen to I AM at all.

Even signs they see as law,

 Instead of an act of love,

 I AM gave,

So they won’t fall.

What they fail to understand,

In their land,

It is the spirit of the sign that matters,

But they are not far enough,

Up the river to gather,

 That I AM will not harm,

But welcome them,

Again,

 With open arms.

When they believe,

 Again in that seed,

 In them of I AM,

Then down, from the pedestal,

 And up from the ground they’ll be,

And run to the river,

To proceed.

But oh, to make it to the next harbor is so hard,

Just the thought of it for most,

Puts them on guard.

“It’s not what’s written,” do they say.

“And what’s written is infallible.

We won’t sway.”

But what they confuse,

Are the laws they choose,

While in Pride.

For,

Those on the river,

Come,

From Inside.

So why don’t they follow their heart,

Instead of their minds? asks a boy.

Because following one’s mind,

Is safe through time.

And following one’s heart,

Gets messy,

From the start.

With one’s mind,

It’s easy to control.

But with one’s heart,

You become what’s known as,

 Vulnerable.

I AM, is that true?

Do you?

Yes, you do, says I AM.

In love’s emotion,

The mind becomes confused.

But it is the only way,

To realize one day,

The strength of I AM,

Within you.

For when the mind goes,

All you have to rely on,

Is either faith or sin.

In sin, the text is your bond.

In faith, you must go beyond,

Into the unknown,

As if you’re alone.

For even with a book,

You still must look.

Because so little was said,

And so little was read,

That only so much was revealed,

And the rest,

Intentionally sealed.

To make,

You have faith.

For when the word is gone,

You must go on.

Into the river’s wake.

Easy is it to follow,

What you can see,

And what you can take.

Hard is it, to believe

That what you see,

On the inside,

Isn’t fake.

Is what you see,

There to deceive,

In a world of make-believe?

Is what you see within,

Really sin?

Or is it truth,

You imagine?

Will you pray to be saved,

And choose to be brave.

Or save,

True Love,

For another day.

But alone in Act, we are not.

Am I Right?, says a girl.

Yes, you are not.

I AM who loves you,

 Will be your light.

In faith it will shine,

Because I AM is yours,

And you,

Are mine.

But what if we do fall?

 Asks the boys and girls.

Will we stay in Fear,

 Like them all?

Listen,

And I AM will say it again.

If you see I AM in the sign,

Then you will remain in line.

But this takes faith well beyond law,

Where the Passives and Aggressives,

Won’t go at all.

For this type of faith,

 Makes,

 Everyone equal,

And it is this type of faith,

 They do not deem useful. 

This is why the Passives and Aggressives,

All live in Fear,

 And most will remain there,

Year after year.

What they can see,

Is what they trust,

 And what they cannot,

 They never fuss.

They do not realize the fact,

 That faith is freer,

And faith is better,

Because it goes,

Beyond letters.

That you obey like the dove,

 When you know,

It’s genuine Love.

And so if you fall,

Which I AM hopes won’t happen at all,

Then I AM will make appear,

Your own boat,

For you here.

So when you again choose to sail,

On the river,

You may prevail.

Then I AM and you,

Will continue,

Through Fear and reach,

The river’s bend.

And it will be there at Fear’s end,

That your time in Fear,

 Will disappear.

Then after we have sailed enough,

We will enter the harbor of Accept,

Where I AM and you,

Will discuss,

Your time in Fear,

Quite in depth.

Just then a boy stood up and said,

This isn’t true.

I don’t need you,

To tell me what to do.

The Aggressives are strong,

And the Passives are weak.

If you want to win,

Aggressives you’ll seek.

I’m tired of you Almighty I AM,

Now let’s move this boat along,

I demand.

And it was at this time,

The thief did appear,

And took the boy,

To live in Fear.

I AM, where did he go? asked the children.

We need to know.

And just then,

From above the water,

Did a boat descend.

Wait I AM! a girl cried.

We can’t just go,

And leave him behind.

He might get hurt,

Or even die!

I AM made it clear,

And he made his choice.

You heard his voice.

Just as I AM said,

I AM left him a boat,

For when the time comes,

 His words are not Aggressive or Passive.

But Assertive,

Coming out of his throat.

Now, I AM and you still have work to do.

We have seen enough of Fear.

It’s time we draw near,

To the end,

And find our next harbor around the bend.

Have faith in I AM,

And do not become Passive towards him.

Do not try to fix or pity his abuse.

Or shame the one he accused.

The boy needs to spend,

 Some time alone.

He has a lesson to learn,

On his own.

And some of the children,

 Started crying.

All except two,

Said they were trying.

But those two,

They got angry for not going back.

So they sulked and said nothing,

Then I AM stopped the boat,

Right in its tracks.

The two of you,

Tell I AM what is wrong.

And one of them stood up and said,

I don’t understand,

 What’s going on.

I AM knows.

But you must have faith.

You will see everything,

If only you wait.

And he came up closer,

To where I AM was,

 And said,

Okay, I AM.

You, I trust. 

But the girl who started,

All the yelling,

She just sat there.

How she’d act?

There was no telling.

What about you? asked I AM.

What do you choose to do?

And just then,

She turned up her head,

 Like she wished I AM,

Was beaten and dead.

And before she turned back,

Like nothing was said,

She gave I AM,

A nonchalant look.

And then she got startled,

 When the boat,

 Shook!

And the thief,

Again appeared,

And took her to Fear.

But this time,

It was to Passive they went.

 And then all the children,

Saw the descent.

And one turned to I AM,

As if there were no event,

And said,

“Well what is the harbor of Accept like?”

And on their way,

 They went.

The harbor of Accept,

Is like a man,

Who gave his friend,

 Things in a suitcase,

To tend,

And asked his friend to save them,

For him.

And when,

The man came back after 20 years,

His friend was in tears.

The man was appalled,

That his friend,

Had lost it all.

So it has to do with trust?

Yes, trust is a must.

But did the man ask too much,

Of his friend in the end?

That is only for his friend to say.

How good are you at hiding things,

Day to day?

What was in the suitcase?

Something he can’t face.

Something he didn’t want anyone to know.

Something he doesn’t want anyone to show.

What would you do if you had a friend like that?

I’d hit him with my bat, says a boy.

  I wouldn’t do that, says a girl.

I’d just look down,

And say okay,

And then turn around,

And walk away.

Haven’t you learned anything at all?

Hitting with a bat?

Only a person before Believe,

Does that.

And be a perfect saint?

That’s what Aggressives and Passives do,

Back and forth through the tunnels,

 To hide their hate.

I’d just forgive him,

Says another girl.

  I mean 20 years,

What do you expect?

Chances were,

You were gonna lose,

That bet.

Why were you gonna lose that bet? asks I AM.

Because you can’t let,

Yourself trust no one in the end,

Not even your friend.

So, that’s what you do,

You forgive and forget.

But your friend said yes,

When you gave him a test.

Whose fault is that?

That’s what I’m saying.

Hit ‘em with a bat!

Okay we’re getting off track.

I’ll explain,

So you know who to blame.

Who would give their friend,

Something to keep for so long,

Thinking his friend in the end,

Would do nothing wrong?

And who would take from their friend,

Something to keep for so long,

Thinking he himself,

Would do nothing wrong?

 I’ll give you a hint.

Was finding or losing the case,

Either’s intent?

What is common in,

Both of them?

They both were stupid to trust the other,

Says another boy.

The man was an Aggressive,

 To test his friend.

And his friend was Passive,

 To let him in.

We don’t know I AM.

And then I AM said,

That is true.

Does anyone else want to,

Give it a try?

I know why,

Says a girl,

Who had been shy.

 They’re both people.

That is why.

You can’t expect people,

To be like you imagine.

If you do,

Then whatever they do,
That’s different from you,

You’ll either attack or balk,

But rarely talk.

You must take people as they come.

There is no perfect someone.

That is all illusion.

And as she put her hand in the air,

She said,

Pardon my intrusion.

Yes, she is right.

Sometimes those who are quiet,

Are the wisest in sight.

Said I AM.

And onto the girl,

I AM gazed,

In admiration,

But not amazed.

For I AM knew,

Through her imagination,

She had gone deep into the land,

Of Understand,

And made the transformation.

And I AM did not say,

But I AM knew,

That no one,

But the Great I AM,

Chose this one to,

Spread the word,

Of what is true.

Who her? Said a boy.

  We figured,

She didn’t even know,

Where we were.

And now you know what you get,

When you assume,

Expecting truth,

  Without understanding your sister or brother.

 The giver and receiver will wrestle each other.

It’s called prejudging or prejudice,

When the facts you don’t heed,

And still rather proceed.

Thinking you went deep enough,

In Understand,

And then decided to act,

As if you wrote the plan.

So then what is the only thing you can expect,

 On your way,

To Accept?

Oh, that’s what the Passives and Aggressives don’t get.

That everyone is human,

Says a boy to the left,

Whose name starts with a T.

Yes! Yes! says I AM.

Now you and she,

Are starting to see,

By using the lumens,

That I AM shines free.

On the river,

Your greatest need,

Hidden from those,

Who only expect,

And won’t accept,
Is that you cannot just let,

Yourself proceed,

Up the river farther,

Passing up harbor after harbor,

And think you will one day sail in,

To a place called heaven.

As I’ve said again and again,

Once you expect,

You’ll never make it to Accept.

And Accept isn’t close,

To the river’s end.

But there is a bridge,

That takes you in,

That changes your reality,

From what was then.

Yes, those sailing in Accept,

Have acquired much wisdom,

But this wisdom can’t be kept,

Within them.

It must be,

Freed,

Near the Lands of Tranquility.

For you must first awaken,

The mind,

And then the heart,

Before you can start,

Towards Devotion.

This is where,

You’ll learn,

And discern,

So much more.

For before,

You are complete,

You must be fully convinced,

Of everything I AM says,

Before sailing into,

Total Confidence.

Remember what I AM said,

That there’s so much more,

Than what is read.

So to continue,

We must agree,

Through these rough waters,

Of humility.

What others call sufferance,

If we are ever going to make it,

 To the harbor,

Of Confidence.

You must endure,

In patience for sure.

Because wherever,

on the River you end,

Is where,

After you cease,

You’ll start up again.

Maybe in Peace,

A city,

in Tranquility,

Or perhaps in Confidence,

Or in one of the harbors,

Along the waters,

Of Sufferance,

Or even at the beginning of Believe,

Where some of your minds are only now,

 Still unwilling to Receive.

That I AM’s appearance here,

Is only,

 To deceive.

And just then,

Three boys and two girls,

Disappeared in the wind,

Because they knew,

What I AM was saying,

Was true.

See, in I AM’s wisdom,

I AM knew,

That these five would see the truth,

Because their minds and hearts,

Were in the right place,

They just needed,

A little space.

So I AM allowed them to sail,

So they’d later prevail,

Later making it through,

From what they now,

Consider new.

You mean, we can go back? says a boy.

Oh yes.  You can go back,

To venture deeper in a harbor,

To find what you lack.

But it takes courage to admit,

You missed a fact,

That you’ve made a mistake.

But these who realized,

Will not be gone,

For very long,

Because they have seen the real I AM,

And will discover,

That where they are,

No one has ever,

Gone this far.

It is those who cheated,

Stowing away in a boat,

Thinking they’ve defeated,

I AM to gloat.

It is they,

Who refuse to ever obey,

To control and wreak havoc,

On others,

Day after day.

These truly believe,

 They are free,

With all they’ve acquired.

But no.  Nobody makes it to Accept,

Especially they in all their desire.

For they are the ones,

Who are the most in debt,

Who refuse to respect.

For this is how it has always been.

Even for my first two I Ams.

From the City,

Of Tranquility,

 Therein.

This you will understand,

When you are on the Sea,

And close to the Lands,

Surrounding Free.

They too had to learn,

So I put them in Decide,

So that they may again earn,

I AM’s trust they denied.

Even those in Nod,

Whose name,

Is the sign of Shame,

Believed in I AM.

But alas, again,

Soon came a time,

 When I AM sent Mine,

To retrieve,

Those in captivity,

From those intent,

On propagating,

Iniquity.

See, what you must get,

Is to face your fear,

In a way you don’t let,

Yourself get tricked,

Into staying there.

A memory through Fear,

Can be a memory so dear.

A reminder of what was,

Can contain also,

A comfort of love,

From the gentle hands,

Of One,

Named I AM.

Then more’s the desire to forgive,

To reinforce your desire to live,

And continue keen,

For your esteem.

No longer is one dependent,

 On depravity,

But will do anything,

To live in the gravity,

Of Peace in Tranquility.

For in Accept,

We know sin is dead,

And life’s ahead.

The mind is sober,

When Devotion takes over.

And I AM looked up and said,

And here we are,

Now at Accept.

So, listen in depth,

To what I AM says true.

Always know this,

If ever confused.

There is nothing you can,

Or will ever do,

That will make I AM,

Ever leave,

 Or stop loving you.

Cheat, steal, or borrow,

Love today,

Or hate tomorrow.

If one moment cloudy,

 And the next moment sunny,

If you cry because you’re sad,

Or cry because it’s funny,

Or maybe because you’re not working,

And you don’t have much money.

Just do your best,

To love,

Your sisters and brothers.

Accept one another,

For the love that they give,

And not for the way,

They choose to live.

Because the way they live,

Is human,

But what they give,

 Is lumen.

And it is lumen,

That frees.

So never put out the light,

Of any one of these,

On this River of Life,

As you sail from Believe,

To Tranquility.

I AM knows,

That none of you would dare impose,

Yourself on others.

This is why you did not disappear,

Like your other sisters and brothers,

But stayed here.

  And now we are at Accept’s end,

About to sail into,

Devotion.

Which is where each of you,

 Will now begin.

No longer will you speak to I AM out here,

But to each of your own I Ams

 In there.

And as I AM pointed to the minds and hearts,

 Of the girls and boys,

One boy asked,

But I AM,

How do we last,

Once you leave?

My son, you know from Believe,

To here,

What to see.

That what I AM says is true,

And once you believe I AM,

Your I Am,

Will be in you.

When you ask I Am to,

In Fear, help you through,

You will see,

I Am instantaneously.

And through Fear you will go,

Now knowing what you know.

It will be then,

That you will feel first hand,

 Trust and accept,

 In this land.

And then back here,

 You will be,

Sailing from Devotion,

Up towards the Sea.

But how long will it take?

Asks one of the boys.

Have faith, said I AM.

But one last thing while you’re still here,

Before I AM disappears.

You and your own I Am must go up the river,

So very many times just together.

When you have reaped the journey enough,

Preparing you for those,

Who think they’re tough,

Then I Am will let you know,

When you are free to sow.

That will be when,

You no longer venture in,

The World of Pride again.

Instead,

Of going ahead,

When you find yourself,

On its shore,


You will state,

‘What a waste,’

And step back,

Into your boat,

Once more.

I AM knows that when then,

You draw near,

That world of Fear,

A distraction is all it will be.

And pass through you will,

Most assertively,

And most efficiently.

But listen to me!

Not always perfectly.

I Am knows this of you.

So at those times,

Do not fret,

But accept,

And back on the river you will be,

Closer to free,

And nearer to Tranquility,

With Me.

Now each of you will be paired,

With another.

So I AM named off,

All sisters and brothers.

Then I AM came last,

 To the girl,

 Shy in the past.

And said,

Tomás, you will go,

With Maggie Rose.

I AM, please,

Just one more question,

Before you leave, asks a girl.

If there is one I Am for each,

Why is it only you’ve been,

Here to teach?

My daughter,

When there are so few,

Who still believe,

Then,

To Believe,

Goes the Great I AM,

Of all eternity.

And the same boy asks,

Please I AM,

How long will it take?

My boy,

Remember to pack,

A big enough,

 Suitcase.

And the Great I AM hugged them one and all,

As the boys and girls started to tear,

And then I AM,

Disappeared.

And after a while,

Tomás stepped up to Maggie and smiled,

And said, I’m ready to leave,

But it’ll sure take a while,

To get to Believe.

And then,

Maggie said,

Back to him,

Tomás,

Just say hello to your I Am,

So we can leave.

And before they knew it,

There they were,

Back in Believe.

From there they started,

 Their long journey,

And Tomás seemed,

Really worried.

Maggie said, as she pointed to the right,

Tomás, I’m going this way,

Where there’s more light.

And Tomás looked to the left and then to the right,

And said all snooty,

 I really doubt to the right is more light.

So, said Maggie,

Which way will you go?

Oh! said a surprised Tomás shakely.

Tomás. Ask your I Am, Maggie said hastily.

Okay, my I Am says,

Your way,

Most definitely.

But I still don’t know.

 But since you’re able to see,

Through the night,

Better than me . . .

Come on, Tomás.  Maggie interrupted.

Do as your I Am,

Has instructed.

You know,

You got to stop doubting,

And believe.

This is going to be good,

For you and me.

It’s not going to be,

Where it’s all guaranteed.

But,

There will be,

More than enough,

Security.

And as they sailed on,

You can hear Tomás,

In the distance,

Respond.

 “Well actually I can’t swim. . .”

And then Maggie looked up and said,

With her hand on her head,

I AM,

Why’dja put me with him?

 

The Third Heaven

Twenty years later in Devote,

All of them,

 Appeared again.

The boys and girls wept in delight.

And as day turned into night,

Maggie, the girl once shy,

Started to cry.

And said, Would it be alright,

If I read you something,

 I had to write?

Of course, said the others.

We’re all sisters and brothers.

Then she began.

This is something I wrote with I Am.

For someone,

 Who died in my hands,

Only a week ago,

In a previous land.

And then Maggie started to read,

For that someone she grieved,

 A poem she had written,

From deep down within.

Walking home after school,

Can I carry your books for the rest of my life?

Tell me your secrets,

I’ll tell you mine.

We played in the fields ev’ry Saturday morning.

The happiest times,

I remember, your beautiful hair blowing.

The sun on your face,

Without a care in the place.

Running here and there,

With your arms in the air.

When I was just a girl,

I helped you,

Wipe away your tears.

To my best friend,

For the rest of my years.

Then, in a café on a street corner,

You were an image through the glass,

An unmistakable glare.

I walked and I peered,

Through the window,

 As you sat on the stool,

With your uptown aire.

And I fell into a trance,

As you magnified my stare.

The one I knew whence,

My best friend for years.

Yes, I stood there and stared,

And I stood there and stared,

At the one that I love,

My betrothed,

For now nearly a year.

And only a few months ago,

We sat on the rocks staring over the ocean.

To me you’re my rock,

And that ocean the potion,

That set me in motion.

For making love in the rain,

I as your wife,

And you,

My devotion.

And when you got sick,

We shed some sorrow.

Oh, Ruth,

My health and my life,

I would have given you,

 To borrow,

For the rest of my life,

Till the ends of tomorrow.

I remember imagining one day,

That you and I,

Were riding,

Inside a train.

Across from me you sit,

 Stealing the scenery,

Of the English terrain,

Like an inquisitive young dame.

My heart melting,

 As I stare at your elderly frame,

Falling in love with you,

All over again.

And then on our porch,

 At ninety-nine,

Holding your hand,

Inside of mine.

With the sun about to set,

I would dream like a fool,

Walking home after school,

With the little girl,

I’d just met.

But my love,

The sun,

Has too early,

 Set.

And after that,

All the boys and girls,

Made a pact,

To always share with one another,

Their devotion,

With pure emotion.

The next morning,

When they awoke,

No longer,

Were they in Devote.

They realized each boat,

Had sailed them away,

Into a bay.

And one of them asks,

Are we not completed?

According to I Am,

Where we are seated,

Is enough.

And it was in the harbor of Complete,

That none of them,

Acted tough.

Their minds and hearts,

Were all awakened,

With I AM’s love,

Unforsaken.

Confident the boys and girls felt,

That no longer did they need to compare themselves,

To anyone else.

No longer did they need themselves,

 To justify,

Because now they can themselves,

Testify,

That no matter what,

And no matter where in every land,

There will always be with them,

Their own I Am.

For when you have,

I Am as a friend,

There’s no better friend,

In the end.

And so it was on that day,

That their I Am and they,

Were married in confidence,

That filled their sails,

With like hurricane gales,

Away from all arrogance.

Though, no longer in ignorance,

They arrived at a state,

 Of childlike innocence.

And yet bewildered were they,

As the river grew narrow.

And the way,

Straight as an arrow,

On a rip-roaring tide.

And to their surprise,

The river began,

 Opening wide.

With no longer land,

On either side.

When right out of nowhere,

A sea did arise.

And the tide,

Began to subside.

And Maggie, no longer shy,

Stood up and cried,

We’re free!

We’ve made it to the Sea!

Just like I AM promised,

If we believed.

And then once on the Sea,

Each girl and boy,

Jumped for joy,

When they saw I AM,

Remarkably.

Welcome children.

I AM said with arms opened wide.

You’ve finally arrived!

Welcome to the Sea of Free,

Where around you are,

 The Lands of Tranquility,

Where there is peace that I AM gives,

And where I AM lives.

And then the I Am in each,

Spoke to their five.

To one of them,

“It is just your time.

Your love through thick and thin,

has gotten you to the end.

Soon you will be,

In Tranquility,

With Me.”

And to two,

“I Am knows your pain.

Your courage, you have sustained.

Soon you will be,

In Tranquility,

With Me.”

And off the three,

 Sailed o’er the Sea,

With the tide,

As calm as can be.

And a gate opened wide,

As the three sailed inside,

To the Lands,

Of Tranquility.

And now only two remained.

Maggie and a woman named,

Tamsin.

And Tamsin said,

I AM,

What is that gate,

 Up ahead?

For you two who have remained,

I AM will now explain.

There are 12 gates,

 Three for each,

North, south, west, and east.

And three other rivers,

That deliver,

Those from their Believe,

To their own Sea of Free.

And from each Sea,

With the tide,

The river continues on inside,

Through each middle gate,

Opening for those who wait.

Through to Tranquility,

To the Garden City,

 Of I AM the Great.

But those gates will only open,

Upon command,

From the Great I AM.

Everyone who,

I AM does not let through,
 Remains,

On the Sea,

Settling on its islands,

Happy and Free.

Here there are many,

Who were in,

 Captivity,

From those in power,

In iniquity,

Who took pleasure in planning,

 Their depravity.

But in great bravery,

 They delivered,

Themselves,

Onto the river,

From hearing,

 I AM’s call,

To one and all.

And then I AM said,

 My children,

Go where you may,

And stay,

On any island you see,

On the Sea of Free.

On each island will be,

Those like you,

That will suit.

Like many a tree,

Bearing fruit.

For you and your I Am,

Will produce,

Many who leave,

And take back with them,

To Believe,

Who you are.

That is . . .

And Maggie, again interrupted.

Yes, I AM,

Who am I?

That was why,

I took this journey,

From Believe,

To the Sea of Free.

And what in Receive,

Did you receive?

I received I AM.

I AM who?

Well, I AM,

you.

Who?

I Am you.

Okay, once more.

I am . . .Ohhh!,

Okay, Maggie, may I continue?

Sure,

said Maggie.

Like I was saying,

To take back with them,

Who you are.

That is,

Love,

From afar.

To sound the call,

For one and all.

And one day within them,

Will be their children.

For Love borne in conception,

Will be forever,

 Their connection,

As too,

Husband and Wife,

In love unconditional,

On the,

River of Life.

This will be the same for the child born in each of You,

Born from you and I am’s passion,

Will be delivered to,

The world, in all directions,

In a certain fashion,

From the Sea of Free,

That surrounds the Island of Tranquility,

And within it, the City.

And as you let go,

And sail through the gates of Tranquility,

The child, your passion, will grow,

And make aware,

Plant a seed,

In the old to youth,

Another of I AM’s truth,

Until one day many will dare,

To in it believe,

And take the journey,

That will set them free.

 

And then Tamsin and Maggie,

Said goodbye to I AM,

And as the sun began, to set,

Sailed away,

Hand in hand,

With their own,

 I Ams.

 

So goodbye,

My friend.

May you hear the call,

Of I AM,

In the wind.

And may you find your way,

On the river,

As your I Am delivers,

You from Believe,

To the Sea of Free.

And one day then,

Into the Lands,

Of Tranquility,

For all,

Eternity.